Monday, February 14, 2005

What to do?!

I'm really confused right now.
My Dr has just managed to make me all suspicious of Ben (the lovely acupuncturist I've been recieving treatment from) He didn't come right out and say that he thinks he may be conning me, but he danced around the issue enough that it's put all sorts of thoughts in my head.

Now it could just be a western medical practitioners mistrust of an unknown.
Or not...
His main concern was not that I'd taken it upon myself to seek this kind of treatment, but that the practitioner in question has also supplied me with these pills that he has no knowledge of.
As far as he can see I'm ok to continue taking them - he stated that I would be unlikely to recieve anything that could do me harm.

The thing is, I'm skint - totally. Acupuncture costs a fair bit, the pills are doled out in an amount suitable for only 24 days and they cost quite a bit too (considering my financial situation) So even though the last couple of days I've been feeling much better - it could be attributed to any number of things besides the acupuncture and herbal remedies.

A thing he was quick to point out.

And he's right. I've also been taking the Dothiepin for a month now so that should be kicking in which could be what's helping me sleep. My diet has changed, I've been steering clear of caffiene and dairy products, I've been drinking twice as much water as usual and I've been forcing myself to do things instead of just (literally) taking it lying down.

His suggestion is to keep taking the pills as I've paid for them now, continue the treatment if I want to (he has another patient who has acupuncture via the hospital and it apparantly helps her) but if after 4 or 5 treatments I see no real improvement, stop wasting my money and look at other alternatives.
And if these don't work or I don't buy any more when they run out and Ben starts urging me to try alternative herbal supplements, I'm to inform him straight away.
Which sux.
I came out feeling as though I'm really stupid. Like once again I've allowed someone to take advantage of me. It wasn't just what he said, it was the pity and disgust on his face when I started telling him about the acupuncture and pills.
I hate feeling like a complete idiot.
It feels even worse because I like Ben, he's a really nice guy - except now there's a little voice in the back of my head saying "yup all good salesmen are nice guys, even if they don't have a clue what they're talking about"

I can't help thinking of Polly (AKA Pondscum) lovely guy, heart's in the right place - can sell anything to anyone. He used to work in a computer store - knew less about Pc's then me. His sales record was 100% though.
I used to watch him in amazement - he'd be blagging this poor family and even when they brought it back as unsuitable for their needs - they still asked for him and he'd sell them something else! Usually for twice as much as the first thing.

So you can understand why I'm confused - and a little worried.
I don't want this to be a temporary 'fix' I've had one sleepy fit in 3 days - and that's despite cleaning the house from top to bottom, cooking full meals and taking trips into town, something I've had problems doing for months.
But I also don't want to be dependant on tablets or expensive treatment because I really can't afford it.
*sigh*
Feck it - I'd best get this dinner on the go, my beloved is going to be setting off soon and I want everything to be done when he gets here.
Valentines eh?! Whoda thunk it...

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